How our minds hijack our life
The other day I was walking alone in Middle Park, which would be considered a reasonably safe suburb in Melbourne. I was loving life and soaking up the sunshine. ☀️ Until… I noticed a man walking toward me.
Nothing unusual, right?
But my mind whispered, as it always does when I see men while walking alone: “You’re not safe.”
So I did what I usually do. Casually crossed the street. Turned a corner. Escaped. 🫥
On the surface, this looks like harmless behaviour. Maybe even smart instincts.
But the truth is — it happens EVERY time. And surely not EVERY man could be out to cause me harm.
What’s really happening here?
You might have heard of the RAS — the Reticular Activating System. Its job is to filter the 11 million bits of information coming at us every second down to something our nervous system can handle - around 126 bits.
But here’s the catch: it doesn’t filter objectively. It predominantly filters based on your subconscious beliefs, most of which were formed between ages 0–7. And then? The mind distorts and generalises. 😳
So what you believe is what you perceive. And for me, the belief was: No men are safe, so what I was perceiving was ‘danger’. Which was completely untrue!
It started with my father raising his voice. A little girl interpreted that as “he isn’t safe” (distortion). Over time, it morphed into “no men are safe” (generalisation).
And like all beliefs, it hasn’t just shaped one part of my life — it’s shaped all of it.
It’s why I’ve walked away from relationships the moment voices were raised.
Why I’ve people-pleased and fawned just to keep the peace.
Why I became hyper-independent, doing everything myself.
Why I try to control my environment to keep others calm.
Why I’ve been single for more than a decade.
And honestly… I could go on.
The thing is, if you don’t know what outdated beliefs are lurking in your subconscious, they will be driving your behaviours and running your life. They’ll have you reacting instead of responding, people-pleasing instead of standing in your power, surviving instead of thriving.
That’s why I created my new program, The Embody True Self Series. We’ll uncover the subconscious beliefs and adaptive behaviours keeping you stuck — and shine a light on them so they finally lose their grip.
We’ll explore your Human Design chart, dive deep into your fear gates, and give you tools to live from a place of alignment, ease, and empowerment.
👉🏻 I’m running a beta round at a reduced rate. Spaces are limited — if you’d like to be part of this first group, send me an email tamara@embodytrueself.com
👉🏻 Grab your FREE Human Design Report HERE
I’ll leave you with some questions to contemplate…
Can you notice any areas in your life where you might be distorting or generalising what you perceive?
How does this effect your behaviour?
Do you think this may be holding you back in other areas of your life?
What would life be like without this belief? How would life feel?